Dont Be Afraid To Turn To Someone Else For Help
If your depression is more severe or not being able to get out of bed is becoming a chronic problem, dont be afraid to ask for help.
Do you live with someone? Do you have a friend or co-worker on the same work schedule as you? Dont be afraid to ask them to be a part of your routine.
If you live with someone, ask them to come in and wake you or maybe sit with you. It can be anything from making coffee in the morning or making sure youre out of bed before they leave for work.
Or reach out to a co-worker, if youre comfortable with that. Someone on the same work schedule may be able to call you when you need to get out of bed in the morning. Five minutes of encouraging wake-up chatter can put you in a better mood for the day ahead.
Most people are compassionate and open to helping. You dont have to share your entire mental health history for them to understand something is going on. Just acknowledging its a difficult time can be enough.
It can be hard to ask for help initially, so remember this: You are not a burden and those who love or care for you will likely be happy to help.
Taking A Stance On Medication
Medication can be very helpful for depression, but it doesnt work well for everyone.
Some people dislike its side effects and prefer to treat depression with therapy or natural remedies. Even if you think your friend should take an antidepressant, remember that choosing to take medication is a personal decision.
Likewise, if you personally dont believe in medication, avoid the subject when talking with them. For some people, medication is key in getting them to a place where they can fully engage in therapy and start taking steps toward recovery.
At the end of the day, whether or not someone with depression takes medication is a very personal decision thats generally best left to them and their healthcare professional.
Depression can increase a persons risk of suicide or self-injury, so its helpful to know how to recognize the signs.
Some signs that might indicate your friend is having serious suicidal thoughts include:
- frequent mood or personality changes
- talking about death or dying
- purchasing a weapon
Whats The Difference Between Sadness And Depression
Whether youve lost a loved one, moved to a new place, or missed out on a job opportunity, there are plenty of stressful and upsetting events that can get you down. However, the difference between sadness and depression is that sadness usually passes with a little time, while depression is a mood disorder that can appear without any specific cause and last for two weeks or more.
Depression impacts almost every part of your life, interfering with how you think, feel, and go about your daily activities like sleeping, working, and socializing. Some common symptoms of depression include:
- Feeling empty
- Difficulty sleeping or sleeping more than normal
- Changes in appetite or weight
- Feelings of hopelessness
- Loss of interest in hobbies or activities
- Irritability or restlessness
- Aches and pains without clear physical causes
- Thoughts of death or suicide
To be diagnosed with depression, these symptoms must be present nearly all day, every day for at least two weeks.
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Youre Not Alone I May Not Understand Exactly How You Feel But Youre Not Alone
Depression is incredibly common. According to quarterly data from the 2019 National Health Interview Survey, about 4.7% of U.S. adults experienced depression regularly. This is from the data we have, but many people dont seek help.
Depression can make many people feel alone and like they should isolate. Tell them theyre not alone. Be there for them, even if you dont have a similar personal experience.
If youve had depression, you can share that you know what theyre going through. This can help them relate. However, keep the focus on them. Remember to listen first.
Create A Morning Routine Worth Waking Up For
Many people myself included get stuck in a routine of dragging themselves out of bed to get to work and thats it. We barely have time for breakfast in our routine. Were just trying to get out the door.
But if you create a morning routine worth waking up for, you may have a different outlook for your morning.
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Remind Them That They Matter
A common feeling among those who are depressed is that their lives don’t matter and no one would even care if they were gone. If you can sincerely tell your friend about all the ways that they matter to you and others, this can help them realize that they have value and worth.
Letting them know that they are an important person in your life can mean a lot when someone is struggling with feelings of depression and worthlessness.
What Treatment Should I Be Offered
The National Institute of Health and Care Excellence writes guidance on what treatment doctors should offer you. But your doctor does not have to give you these treatments. And the treatments may not be available in your area.
Different treatments may be available in your area. Your doctor might think these suit your symptoms more than the recommended treatments.
NICE recommend that depression is treated in different steps depending on how severe the condition is for you. The steps are as follows.
Step 1: Everyone who may have depression
Your doctor should offer you:
- an assessment of your symptoms,
- support, such as regular appointments in person or by telephone,
- information on how to deal with your symptoms,
- monitoring of your symptoms and follow-up, and
- referral for further assessment and treatment if needed.
Step 2: Mild to moderate depression
Your doctor may offer you:
- low-intensity interventions, such as self-help guided by the doctor or computerised cognitive behavioural therapy ,
- physical activity programmes,
- group cognitive behavioural therapy ,
- medication if you have a history of moderate or severe depression, or you have had symptoms for a long time, and
- referral for further assessment and treatment if needed.
Step 3: Moderate to severe depression, or mild to moderate depression when other treatments havent worked
Your doctor may suggest:
Step 4: Severe and complex depression or if your life is at risk Your doctor may suggest:
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Make Morning Plans With A Friend
Depression can lead to feeling isolated, disconnected, and shut-off. The opportunity to âconnectâ again may be the key to getting the day started.
Making morning plans with someone is a great way to hold yourself accountable, because youâre taking someone elseâs schedule into consideration, as well.
âPeople derive meaning from their relationships with others, their passions, or accomplishing tasks during the course of their day,â says Dr. Randall Dwenger, medical director at Mountainside Treatment Center in Connecticut.
âCommitting to meet someone for breakfast or coffee or a morning walk can not only help you get out of bed, but will also help foster your connection to another human, so you donât feel so alone in your depression,â Dwenger tells us.
Accountability and connection for the win.
For some people, however, having someone else to âreport toâ can be counterproductive. In that case, come up with a system to track your progress for motivation. Write it down, use a reward system â whatever works to hold yourself accountable.
Getting Out Of A Funk: How To Help Yourself Through Depression
Everyone has off days where they feel tired, irritable, and sad. Its normal to feel sadness as a response to challenging life events, loss, or changes, but sometimes these feelings can stick around for a while if left unaddressed and make it difficult for you to get through each day.
Heres how you can tell when youre in a funk or maybe even experiencing a mild depression as well as what you can do to help yourself feel better.
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Encourage Them To Seek Help#
When a loved one is depressed, the best thing you can do is be a good friend by listening and showing support. But it is just as important that you encourage them to seek out professional help or assist them in connecting with the available resources to get the medical help that they need. Depression isnt the same for everyone, but it can be debilitating, notes McInnis. Look out for your friend or loved ones well-being and learn the warning signs for a life-threatening situationa time to immediately call in professional help.And dont forget to take stock of your own mental health, too. When someone we love is living with depression, it can be very easy to make them your primary focus. Be sure to take care of yourself through this time, says McInnis. Because you wont be of any good to yourself or others if you are burned out and disregarding your own self-care.
Remind Them It’s Ok To Feel The Way They Feel
Even if your friend’s problems may seem minor to you, resist the urge to judge or come up with simple solutions. The biochemical imbalances associated with depression are what is driving how bad your friend feels about certain situationsnot necessarily the situations themselves.
Instead, let them know that you are sorry that they are feeling so badly and adopt an attitude of acceptance that this is how their depression is affecting them. If your friend only recently started taking medications or attending counseling, it can take time for them to begin to feel better.
Just as an antibiotic for strep throat takes a while to work, antidepressants can take some time to change chemicals in the brain .
During this time, what your friend needs most is not references to fast, easy solutions, but an awareness that you will be by their side through their treatment.
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More Spirit Fillers Less Time Killers
Very often, the cycle of depression feeds on itself. We feel depressed, so its really hard to find the motivation and energy to do the uplifting things that have the potential to feed our spirits. Then we feel even more depressed. And so it goes.
This tip is about raising your awareness of how you fill the hours in your day. Its far too easy to spend our days doing things that fill our time, but dont necessarily fill our spirits. I know it can be hard to break out of our usual routines and do something thats new or different or that might bring up emotions. But in the end, finding activities to fill our spirits helps so much with decreasing depression and increasing peace.
Of course, everyone needs to find what feeds their spirits. One person might love gardening and another person might find it to be a chore. One person might enjoy cooking and someone else doesnt like cooking at all. Its such an individual exploration, but the bottom line is, if we keep doing what were doing, were going to keep getting what were getting. If you have been spending a lot of time in negativity, inactivity, or isolation, in order to lift your spirits, youll need to make some changes.
Think about the ways that you spend your time. Not just the usual things you do each day like work, school, childcare or meal preparation, but the things you do in between the things you do:
What Causes Depression In Men
Depression is one of the most common mental disorders in the U.S. Current research suggests that depression is caused by a combination of risk factors including:
- Genetic factorsmen with a family history of depression may be more likely to develop it than those whose family members do not have the illness.
- Environmental Stressfinancial problems, loss of a loved one, a difficult relationship, major life changes, work problems, or any stressful situation may trigger depression in some men.
- Illnessdepression can occur with other serious medical illnesses, such as diabetes, cancer, heart disease, or Parkinsons disease. Depression can make these conditions worse and vice versa. Sometimes, medications taken for these illnesses may cause side effects that trigger or worsen depression.
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Shine A Little Light On It: Light Therapy
Everyones different. But the thing that really turned me around from someone curled into a ball of depression and hopelessness to sitting up in bed was light therapy.
Bright light therapy is often recommended for people with major depressive disorder with a seasonal pattern or sleep disorders.
More research is still needed, but evidence suggests it may have the potential to help people with depression and have antidepressant-like qualities. My psychologist, and a few other experts Ive met, also recommend these lights for people with other types of nonseasonal depression.
Sitting in front of the light for a few moments is necessary to get your dose, meaning theres no need to jump out of bed immediately. As my eyes fight to even open, I usually lean over, turn on the little box of sunshine in my room and its sort of impossible to close them again.
I can check my phone or grab a cup of warm tea and come back to face the light for 20 minutes while still in bed. By the time thats over, Ive found Im ready to get up and start moving. My boyfriend also sits with me and says he feels more awake when he does.
According to the Mayo Clinic, the typical recommendation for seasonal depression is to use a 10,000-lux light box 16 to 24 inches from your face. Use it daily for about 20 to 30 minutes, preferably early in the morning after first waking up. Find a light box online.
Bring Up Your Concerns With Your Loved One
If you notice signs of depression in your loved one, its important to calmly share your concerns in a way thats nonjudgmental, says Ole Thienhaus, MD, a professor of psychiatry at the University of Arizona College of Medicine in Tucson. Its also crucial to give your loved one space to talk about what theyre feeling.
Listening is the most important part of beginning to help, Dr. Thienhaus says.
To get them talking, you may start by sharing the changes youve observed recently that worry you, Thienhaus says. When you do this, dont be critical just state the facts as you see them in a neutral way and pause often to give them room to respond to what you have to say.
Avoid any suggestion that they have no reason to feel so sad, Thienhaus adds. This means not saying things like, Look at all the good things in your life or Look at how much worse off so-and-so is, but she doesnt let her problems get her down.
Why is this harmful? Many people with depression already believe they should be able to snap out of it or should be mentally strong, Thames says, feelings that can stand in their way of seeking treatment for depression.
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How Can I Help Someone With Depression
Depression is a serious but treatable disorder that affects millions of people, from young to old and from all walks of life. It gets in the way of everyday life, causing tremendous pain, hurting not just those suffering from it but also impacting everyone around them.
If someone you love is depressed, you may be experiencing any number of difficult emotions, including helplessness, frustration, anger, fear, guilt, and sadness. These feelings are all normal. Its not easy dealing with a friend or family members depression. And if you neglect your own health, it can become overwhelming.
That said, your companionship and support can be crucial to your loved ones recovery. You can help them to cope with depression symptoms, overcome negative thoughts, and regain their energy, optimism, and enjoyment of life. Start by learning all you can about depression and how to best talk about it with your friend or family member. But as you reach out, dont forget to look after your own emotional healthyoull need it to provide the full support your loved one needs.
Know The Warning Signs Of Suicide
The risk of suicide is high in those living with depression. No matter what you say or what you do to help your friend, they may still experience suicidal thoughts and feelings. Make sure to be on the lookout for warning signs of suicide and know when to seek help.
Some signs to watch for include:
- Talking about wanting to die
- Expressing that they feel like a burden to others
- Feelings of extreme hopelessness and sadness
- Withdrawing from friends and loved ones
- Sudden mood swings
- Giving away possessions or making a will
- Making ambiguous statements about not being around in the future
- Open discussions about suicide or having a suicide plan
- Previous suicide attempts
If you spot warning signs of suicide, you should talk to your loved one and ask them to speak with a mental health professional. When there is an immediate risk, you should remove dangerous items from the home, make sure you don’t leave them alone, and get help from a medical professional immediately.
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Seeing A Doctor About Depression
Big changes in your life, like bereavement, losing a job, or even having a baby, can cause symptoms of depression. You’re also more likely to experience depression if you have a family history of depression. However, it’s also possible to become depressed without there being an obvious reason.
You can learn more about depression causes here.