Spend Time With Your Dad
Touch is not experienced as a mere sensation, but effectively as an emotion. Harness the power of touch. People lacking affection tend to struggle more with depression. Offer a light touch of support and give him a warm hug. A touch as simple as a pat on the back or a tight hug can communicate your love and care even better than verbal language.
Your dad loves you even if he is unable to properly show it to you at the moment. Show your dad you love him by making it a point to spend time with him. Taking the initiative to do something simple together might mean more than you think.
Spend time outdoors with your dad. Go to the park or take a walk around the block together. The sun produces natural vitamin D in your body, which can help alleviate symptoms of depression . Interact with your dad about everyday stuff. Invite him to contribute to your life in some simple way, even if its as small as asking him to see a movie with you.
Dr Casey Noreika Psyd
Dr. Casey Noreika, PsyD, works with Clarity Clinic in Chicago.
Depression in the senior population can look different than in younger populations but is just as complex
When one thinks of depression, they often think of sadness and maybe crying or tearfulness. However, other symptoms, such as low energy or fatigue, low motivation, and irritability, are also common. Changes in sleeping habits and appetite are also important things to look for.
Handling depression as a caregiver comes with its challenges and can lead to caregiver burnout. It is important to know how to behave and care for those who are affected by depression. Be patient with your loved ones or those you care for. It is common to become frustrated, and this can impact your interactions with those you are caring for. Its especially important to try to stay calm and respond in a relaxed, even tone.
Understanding depression is difficult to overcome, and realizing depression takes away one’s desire and motivation is also key. Given these symptoms, it is best to encourage continued social interactions and activities. Initiate conversations with family, friends, or neighbors and get your loved one involved in a local senior center that provides activities and interactions with others in the same age group.
This Is One Of The Most Difficult Things You Can Experience But Know That Youre Not Alone
The isolation that a depressed person feels is one of the hardest things to cope with. When you acknowledge their pain and remind Mom or Dad that theyre not alone, youre letting them know that theyre being seen and heard. This isnt easy and there are no quick solutions. But you can let them know that you are truly there for them. Knowing this might help your parent remember their own value and worth.
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Meet Yourself Where You Are
Depression is common. It affects millions of people, including some in your life. You may not realize they face similar challenges, emotions, and obstacles.
The key to navigating depression is to be open, accepting, and loving toward yourself and what youre going through.
Every day with this disorder is different. Its important to take your mental health seriously and accept that where you are right now isnt where youll always be.
Future Screening For Paternal Postpartum Depression
Most Ob/Gyns check new moms for depression and anxiety symptoms during a postpartum visit. But there is no such check-up for men.
In 2019, the American Academy of Pediatrics recommended that postpartum depression screenings not be solely the responsibility of obstetricians. They urged pediatricians to incorporate maternal postpartum depression screenings and referrals for treatment during well-child visits.
In 2020, an editorial in the Journal of the American Academy of Pediatrics, regardless of gender, and to make appropriate referrals when necessary.
Dont be surprised if your partners Ob/Gyn or babys pediatrician asks about your mental health during a visit. This evaluation could range from engaging in an informal discussion to filling out the Edinburgh Postnatal Depression Scale , a simple screening tool consisting of 10 questions. Prioritizing the mental well-being of moms and dads is not only good for them, but for the baby.
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What To Say To Someone Who Is Depressed
Not everyone with depression will want to talk about it. And its important to realize that you cant force your mom or dad to open up about their feelings if they dont want to. However, there are a few things you can say that will, at the very least, help to express how much you love them and care about their well-being.
Increased Depression After The Death Of My Father
I was diagnosed with depression. My dad passed away four days ago. Before the death, my depression was perfectly controlled I was very strong and happy. I thought that I am unbeatable and nothing could harm me or cause my depression again! I was very happy and excited. However, when I was told that my father has just passed away, I was very shocked and in doubt that he passed away. I am still in doubt due to the shock!! I am sleeping 12 hours a day due to increased depressive symptoms! I feel the desire to sleep all the time even when I am typing these words to escape the reality. I feel no reason to stay alive. I do not mean suicidal thoughts or attempts but I mean hmm, actually I feel it difficult to select the appropriate word here. May I feel no motivation for staying alive. Is anybody willing to help me?
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Help Them Get Support
While your compassion and guidance can make a big difference for your child, professional support is typically the best way to improve symptoms.
If they resist the idea of therapy at first, talking to a school counselor, family pediatrician, or favorite teacher can help them get more comfortable with the idea. They might be more willing to consider therapy when other trusted adults encourage them to reach out.
Talking over what happens in therapy can also help demystify the process. If they seem worried about being hospitalized or forced to take medication, explain that a therapist will listen to their thoughts, offer support without judgment, and help them explore ways to start feeling better.
You can also explain that, while medication can help relieve severe symptoms, they have other treatment options, too.
Newport Academy offers mental health treatment for teens dealing with anxiety, depression, substance abuse, eating disorders, and other mental health conditions.
The Effects On Children
For parents with depression, there are the obvious detrimental symptomsemotional pain, lack of motivation, loss of joy in once-joyful activitiesand even physical troubles such as gastrointestinal distress and reduced immunity. But research has found that children of depressed parents are about three times as likely to suffer from major depression, anxiety disorders, or substance abuse as children whose parents hadn’t been depressed.
All kids have developmental needs that include feeling securely attached to a safe, caring adult and having a caregiver who is both physically and emotionally present and can model adequate coping mechanisms, says LaToya Gaines, Psy.D., a clinical psychologist and former school psychologist in New York City. Untreated mental-health concerns can threaten a parent’s ability to fulfill these needs. “When we’re depressed, we have difficulty connecting,” says Kristen Granchalek, LCSW, a Chicago-based therapist specializing in women’s issues, anxiety, and emotional reactivity. “Our faces don’t respond in a way that mirrors our children’s emotions, which they need for healthy development and to feel cared for.” With anxiety, kids can absorb their parent’s chronic worrying and, says Granchalek, “internalize the belief that the world is not okay.”
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How Can Family Members Support Depressed Dads
The first step is to recognize whats going on and take it seriously. If you notice a personality shift in a dad who is expecting or has a new baby, encourage him to talk with a mental health professional.
After your baby comes, tips to support dad include:
- Encouraging him to be involved with the baby, bathing, dressing, or feeding him or her whenever possible.
- Taking childcare shifts so you both get adequate sleep. Family members of single parents can step in to make sure mom or dad gets as much rest as possible.
- Spending time together. Understand that its common for your sex life to change after having a baby.
Finally, make sure dad knows prenatal and postpartum depression are common and treatable. And dads, please remember that asking for help when you are struggling is the best thing you can do for yourself and your family.
To talk with a doctor about prenatal or postpartum depression, call or request an appointment online.
Causes Of Teen Depression
Biological factors, such as genes, can increase a teens risk of developing depression. However, environmental and social conditions also have a role to play. The following factors may trigger or exacerbate symptoms of depression in your teen:
Bullying.Being bullied by peers can add stress to a teens life and affect their self-esteem. This can, in turn, trigger feelings of intense helplessness and hopelessness.
Other mental and physical health conditions. Teen depression is associated with a number of other mental health problems, including eating disorders, self-injury, anxiety, ADHD, or a learning disorder. The struggles that accompany these conditions may lead a teen to feel unconfident and frustrated when it comes to academics and socializing. Similarly, physical disabilities or chronic illness can also play a role.
Past and present stressful experiences. Past trauma from violent or abusive situations can put teens at risk of depression as well as post-traumatic stress disorder . Recent events, such as the loss of a loved one, can also trigger a depressed mood.
Lack of social support. Teens who feel unsupported by family or peers are at risk of depression. For example, a teen may be struggling with their sexual identity in a hostile or unaccepting environment.
Depression and social media use
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When Its Time For Immediate Help
Not everyone with depression thinks about suicide. Many people who do have suicidal thoughts never make a plan or attempt suicide. That said, youll want to take any mention of suicide seriously.
Its time to get professional support right away if you notice any of the following signs in your child:
- writing stories or poems about dying
- exhibiting risk-taking behavior, including substance or alcohol use
- talking about dying or wanting a way out of their pain
- becoming more withdrawn from others
- saying others would be better off without them
- giving away personal possessions
If they tell you theyre thinking about suicide:
- Ask if theyve made a crisis or safety plan in therapy, and follow those steps.
- Connect them with their therapist for guidance on next steps.
- Encourage them to text the Crisis Text Line or call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline for 24/7 crisis support.
- Take them to the emergency room for support.
Encourage Them To Think About What They Enjoy Doing
Take a step-by-step approach towards helping them do these activities when they feel able to. This could be things like exercising or playing sport, listening to music, doing something creative like colouring or drawing, watching a favourite film, reading a favourite book or going for a walk with you.
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What If I Dont Know What To Say
Dont wait to talk just because youre not sure what to say. You can keep it simple. You can start just by saying, Got a minute? I need to talk. Then say whats on your mind. For example, Ive been feeling down a lot lately. I think I should talk to you about it. The person youre talking to might ask you to tell them more. Sometimes, thats all it takes to get started talking.
How To Deal With A Depressed Parent
This article was co-authored by Trudi Griffin, LPC, MS. Trudi Griffin is a Licensed Professional Counselor in Wisconsin specializing in Addictions and Mental Health. She provides therapy to people who struggle with addictions, mental health, and trauma in community health settings and private practice. She received her MS in Clinical Mental Health Counseling from Marquette University in 2011.There are 12 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.wikiHow marks an article as reader-approved once it receives enough positive feedback. In this case, 83% of readers who voted found the article helpful, earning it our reader-approved status. This article has been viewed 328,595 times.
Its difficult to know your role when your parent has depression. Depending on your age, there may be very little you can do to help, but there are some things which may help you to deal with having a depressed parent.
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How To Support Someone Youre Worried About
Talk to an adult you trust about your concerns to get support. Your mental health is just as important as the person youre worried about you need supportive, caring people around you. Living with someone with depression can be extremely difficult at times and having support is so important.
I Care About You
Let the person youre worried about know that you care about them. Say it plainly and honestly while you look them directly in the eyes. When a person has depression, they might feel as if they dont matter to anyone. Letting them know thats not the case might make a difference.
How Can I Help?
When someone has depression, even the simplest tasks can feel like a mountain to climb. Offer to help where you can this helps to reduce some of the anxiety and stress your loved one might be battling with.
Do You Want To Talk?
Ask your loved one if they want to talk. They may not want to talk to you about their feelings but knowing youre there for them can be reassuring. You could also suggest they talk to their doctor to get help. Explain how concerned you are about them and encourage them to visit their GP to get an experts opinion.
Youre Not Alone
Depression can be the loneliest feeling in the world. Let your loved one know that they are not alone. Being by their side, holding their hand, listening to them calmly and patiently all of these things help to show them that they are not alone in this world and that someone cares about them.
What Not To Say To Someone Who Is Depressed
Just as there are a few things that might be helpful for a depressed person to hear, there are some things that will feel more like a judgement or a dismissal. Its a wise idea to avoid saying the following statements.
- Everything will be fine, I promise. Its just a hard time. This is dismissing the problem and may only make Mom or Dad feel that youre ignoring their feelings. Plus, promising that things will be fine is just an empty platitude.
- I dont know what you have to be sad about. Just cheer up!People with depression cannot just cheer up. Telling Mom or Dad that you dont understand why theyre depressed isnt helpful, and it only contributes to the feelings of shame and confusion that can surround depression.
- Snap out of it. Again, people suffering from depression dont have the luxury of simply snapping out of it. This kind of language is crude and dismissive.
- There are people far worse off than you. Comparing one persons depression to the suffering of other people is, for one thing, a false equivalency. Its also very unhelpful. Your parent will only feel judged that their suffering isnt worth it.
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How Can Talking To A Parent Help
It can feel like a big relief to have someone listen, hear you out, and show they care. Talking together can help you feel more hopeful. It lets you know you’re not alone. Someone believes in you and has your back.
Sometimes, a parent can help you see another angle to a problem you’re dealing with. They can give good advice. When you feel their support, it’s easier to think of ways to help yourself, too.
How To Help A Depressed Teenager
Depression is very damaging when left untreated, so dont wait and hope that worrisome symptoms will go away. If you suspect that your teen is depressed, bring up your concerns in a loving, non-judgmental way. Even if youre unsure that depression is the issue, the troublesome behaviors and emotions youre seeing are signs of a problem that should be addressed.
Open up a dialogue by letting your teen know what specific depression symptoms youve noticed and why they worry you. Then ask your child to share what theyre going throughand be ready and willing to truly listen. Hold back from asking a lot of questions , but make it clear that youre ready and willing to provide whatever support they need.
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What To Say If Mom Or Dad Is Depressed
If you think that your parent is depressed or if theyve admitted to struggling with difficult feelings, its important to make them aware that youre there for them during these hard times and youre willing to help.
Let them know that its alright for them to feel the way they feel, and that youre there to talk if they want to. There is no easy answer about what to say to someone who is depressed. But you want to avoid saying things that dismiss their feelings or make them feel judged.
If your parent is experiencing suicidal thoughts, or outwardly expressing feelings of sadness or a desire to end their life, seek professional help right away.
Have you dealt with depression yourself, or know someone who has? Have you helped your mom or dad through a depressive episode? We want to hear more about your own personal experience.