Why Do Men Get Depressed
While some men are attuned to what may be causing anger and upset in their lives, others may not realize how stress is impacting their physical and emotional health or how environmental factors are having an effect on their behavior. There are any number of reasons why men may be depressed and angry, but these are some of the common causes of depression in men:
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Why May Depression Present As Anger
The use of ineffective or inappropriate emotional regulation strategies as well an impaired ability to process negative information may play a role in developing depression. Authors of a review published in Cardiovascular Psychiatry and Neurology noted that these behaviors can result in:
Rumination: repetitive, unwanted, past-oriented negatively inclined thoughts. Individuals who ruminate may mentally rehearse past stressful events and worry about future events.
Impaired cognitive reappraisal: inability to reframe ones thoughts about emotion-eliciting occurrences to change their effects.
Increased expressive suppression: attempts to hide, inhibit or reduce ongoing emotion-expressive behavior.
But how does that relate to anger? A separate study in the Asian Journal of Psychiatry sought to explain the mediating role of emotional regulation and anger rumination on the relation between anger and major depressive disorder. Researchers ultimately found that people with depression were more likely to experience anger and irritability if they lacked the ability to emotionally regulate and ruminated on negative events.
Similarly, a study in the Journal of the Society for Social Work and Research indicates that African American patients with depression may culturally express the mood disorder as irritability, increased agitation, increased hostility and internalized anger. They may also be less likely to verbalize feelings of depression.
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Linking Anger And Depression
Medication For Anger And Depression
Medication for depression and medication for anger can also help reduce the severity of your symptoms. SSRIs such as Zoloft, Paxil, Celexa, and Prozac help balance the neurotransmitters impacting your emotions and mood. As a result, these antidepressants may boost your overall mood and help you feel less reactive to stressful situations.
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Acknowledge Your Underlying Emotion
Sometimes it helps to take a moment and think about what emotions might be lurking beneath your anger. Anger often serves as a protective mask to help you avoid feeling more painful emotions, like embarrassment, sadness, and disappointment.
When someone gives you feedback thats hard to hear, for example, you might lash out in anger because youre embarrassed. Convincing yourself the other person is bad for criticizing you might make you feel better in the moment because it keeps your embarrassment at bay. But acknowledging underlying emotions can help you get to the root of the problem. Then, you can decide to take appropriate action.
For instance, if someone cancels plans on you and your underlying emotion is disappointment, you could try explaining how the cancellation makes you feel rather than lashing out in anger. When you’re honest about your feelings, you’re more likely to resolve the issue. Responding in anger usually doesn’t accomplish anything except pushing people away.
What Do Depression And Anger Outbursts Look Like
The anger outbursts linked to depression can seem very odd and unexpected. Often, they come without warning and can involve a mix of feelings and emotions.
Angry depression outbursts could look like:
- Short but intense anger
- Jumping to conclusions that do not make sense
- Displays of anger mixed with or followed by sadness, shame, or guilt
- Blaming another person or a group of people for the feelings or situation
- Lack of insight regarding the source of anger
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What Anger Looks Like
Everyone has their own ways of expressing anger. While one person might direct anger outward in a physical way, another may avoid confrontation entirely, turning the anger inward. Maybe youre someone who gets over a conflict quickly, or you might be more likely to ruminate and hold a grudge.
The way you express anger not only impacts the relationships you have with the people in your lifebut can affect your relationship with anger itself.
If youre prone to outbursts, for example, you may feel so much shame afterward that you become afraid of expressing anger in the future. Ironically, this can lead to a bottling up effect that actually disposes you to lose control again.
Conversely, if you feel guilty about your anger, to begin with, you might look for ways youre at fault, turning anger into self-criticism and redirecting it towards yourself.
Explore Anger Management Resources
There are several support groups and anger management programs, both in-person and online, that can be helpful. Identify one that could be appropriate for the person and encourage them to join it.
There are also several books, videos, podcasts, and other resources designed to help people with anger issues. You can share them with the person and encourage them to explore them, to help them improve their communication skills.
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How We React To Anger
How you react to feeling angry depends on lots of things, including:
- the situation you are in at the moment if you’re dealing with lots of problems or stress in your life, you may find it harder to control your anger
- your family history you may have learned unhelpful ways of dealing with anger from the adults around you when you were a child
- events in your past if you have experienced events that made you angry but felt you couldn’t express your anger, you may still be coping with those angry feelings
Some people express anger verbally, by shouting. Sometimes this can be aggressive, involving swearing, threats or name-calling.
Some people react violently and lash out physically, hitting other people, pushing them or breaking things. This can be particularly damaging and frightening for other people.
Some of us show anger is passive ways, for example, by ignoring people or sulking.
Other people may hide their anger or turn it against themselves. They can be very angry on the inside but feel unable to let it out.
People who tend to turn anger inwards may harm themselves as a way of coping with the intense feelings they have. Young people are most likely to self harm.
What Is The Prognosis For Intermittent Explosive Disorder
People with intermittent explosive disorder tend to have poor life satisfaction and lower quality of life. It can have a very negative impact on your health and can lead to severe personal and relationship problems.
Cognitive therapy and medication can successfully manage IED. However, according to studies, IED appears to be a long-term condition, lasting from 12 to 20 years or even a lifetime.
Having intermittent explosive disorder makes it more likely that youll develop the following conditions:
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Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Treatment For Anger Disorders
One of the most common types of psychotherapy is cognitive behavioral therapy. The purpose of the treatment is to help an angry person recognize the self-defeating negative thoughts that lie behind anger flare-ups. Patients work with a mental health professional to learn how to manage stressful life circumstances more successfully.
The cognitive behavioral approach has many benefits. Patients learn to:
- Cope better with difficult life situations
- Positively resolve conflicts in relationships
- Deal with grief more effectively
- Mentally handle emotional stress caused by illness, abuse or physical trauma
- Overcome chronic pain, fatigue and other physical symptoms
Cognitive therapies are structured and may offer quicker results than other approaches. Better yet, the results are lasting, with patients showing significantly decreased relapse rates.
This sort of treatment tends to focus on specific problems and personal triggers. Youll learn how to deal with your particular issues using conscious, goal-centered strategies.The specific steps in cognitive behavioral therapy include:
- Identification of situations or circumstances in your life that lead to trouble
- Awareness of your thoughts and emotions surrounding anger triggers
- Acknowledgement of inaccurate, negative thought patterns
- Relearning of healthier, positive thought patterns
Some Other Tips For Easing Up On Yourself
Timing: If you and your spouse tend to fight when you discuss things at nightperhaps youre tired, or distracted, or maybe its just habittry changing the times when you talk about important matters so these talks dont turn into arguments.
Avoidance: If your childs chaotic room makes you furious every time you walk by it, shut the door. Dont make yourself look at what infuriates you. Dont say, well, my child should clean up the room so I wont have to be angry! Thats not the point. The point is to keep yourself calm.
Finding alternatives: If your daily commute through traffic leaves you in a state of rage and frustration, give yourself a projectlearn or map out a different route, one thats less congested or more scenic. Or find another alternative, such as a bus or commuter train.
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What Are The Signs And Symptoms Of Intermittent Explosive Disorder
The main sign of intermittent explosive disorder is a pattern of outbursts of anger that are out of proportion to the situation or event that caused them. People with IED are aware that their anger outbursts are inappropriate but feel like they cant control their actions during the episodes.
The aggressive outbursts:
After an outburst, you may feel a sense of relief, followed by regret and embarrassment.
What If Their Behaviour Is Abusive Or Violent
Just because someone seems very angry, it doesn’t necessarily mean that they will become violent or abusive. But if this does happen, the most important thing is to make sure that you are safe.
I need my family to speak to me honestly but remain understanding. We have code words that we all can use when I’m either being unreasonable or when I feel like I might lash out.
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Does Anger Cause Depression
An older article in the journal BJPsych Advances linked feeling angry with the development of depression.
The authors of the article suggest that this anger stems from narcissistic vulnerability, which is when a person is extremely sensitive to any perceived rejection or loss.
Experiencing rejection may cause feelings of anger, which can lead to a person fearing that their anger will damage their relationships.
They may then turn this anger toward themselves, which can lead to low self-esteem and depression.
However, there is little research available to support this theory or show that anger can cause depression.
People who experience anger and depression may have some of the following symptoms:
- Selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors : These include fluoxetine, sertraline, citalopram, paroxetine, and escitalopram.
- Serotonin and norepinephrine reuptake inhibitors : These include venlafaxine, duloxetine, and desvenlafaxine.
According to a 2019 systematic review , sertraline can be effective in treating both depression and anger.
The majority of the studies concluded that many of the individuals who experienced high levels of irritability and anger responded well to sertraline. After roughly 2 weeks, the sertraline appeared to have improved their mood and reduced their feelings of anger.
However, the authors note that not all of the participants responded to this treatment.
What Can I Do If My Partner Has Anger Issues
Most importantly, ensure your safety. You cant help anyone if you are not safe.
If you need help, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800-799-SAFE to get connected with resources that can help.
When you are not in immediate danger, consider reaching out to a mental health professional for guidance. They can help you make a plan either for leaving safely or helping your partner get help. It can be helpful to get an outside, professional perspective on the situation.
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Learn About Intermittent Explosive Disorder
Intermittent explosive disorder is an impulse-control disorder characterized by sudden episodes of unwarranted anger. The disorder is typified by hostility, impulsivity, and recurrent aggressive outbursts. People with IED essentially explode into a rage despite a lack of apparent provocation or reason. Individuals suffering from intermittent explosive disorder have described feeling as though they lose control of their emotions and become overcome with anger. People with IED may threaten to or actually attack objects, animals, and/or other humans. IED is said to typically begin during the early teen years and evidence has suggested that it has the potential of predisposing individuals to depression, anxiety, and substance abuse disorders. Intermittent explosive disorder is not diagnosed unless a person has displayed at least three episodes of impulsive aggressiveness.
Individuals with IED have reported that once they have released the tension that built up as a result of their rage, they feel a sense of relief. Once the relief wears off, however, some people report experiencing feelings of remorse or embarrassment. While IED can be extremely disruptive to an individuals life, as well as to the lives of those around him or her, IED can be managed through proper treatment, through education about anger management, and possibly through the use of medication.
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Help Them Find Support
Your friend may not be aware theyre dealing with depression, or they may be unsure how to reach out for support.
Even if they know therapy could help, it can be daunting to search for a therapist and make an appointment.
If your friend seems interested in counseling, offer to help them review potential therapists. You can help your friend list things to ask potential therapists and things they want to mention in their first session.
Encouraging them and supporting them to make that first appointment can be so helpful if theyre having a hard time with it.
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Supporting Your Loved One’s Treatment
One of the most important things you can do to help a friend or relative with depression is to give your unconditional love and support throughout the treatment process. This involves being compassionate and patient, which is not always easy when dealing with the negativity, hostility, and moodiness that go hand in hand with depression.
Provide whatever assistance the person needs . Help your loved one make and keep appointments, research treatment options, and stay on schedule with any treatment prescribed.
Have realistic expectations. It can be frustrating to watch a depressed friend or family member struggle, especially if progress is slow or stalled. Having patience is important. Even with optimal treatment, recovery from depression doesn’t happen overnight.
Lead by example. Encourage the person to lead a healthier, mood-boosting lifestyle by doing it yourself: maintain a positive outlook, eat better, avoid alcohol and drugs, exercise, and lean on others for support.
Encourage activity. Invite your loved one to join you in uplifting activities, like going to a funny movie or having dinner at a favorite restaurant. Exercise is especially helpful, so try to get your depressed loved one moving. Going on walks together is one of the easiest options. Be gently and lovingly persistentdon’t get discouraged or stop asking.
Preventing Anger From Feeding Depression
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