Monday, April 22, 2024

How To Tell Your Counselor You Re Depressed

Discuss Ways To Troubleshoot Telehealth Problems

How Do You Tell Someone That Youre Depressed?

Why do I hate virtual therapy? Let me count the ways. My WiFi connection sucks and cuts out when Im trying to have a freaking breakthrough! Body language is lost! Silences are awkward! I get distracted by my own face on video chat! Having therapy in the comfort of my own home blurs all sorts of boundaries! I could go on and on. And while theres no way to make all of your telehealth problems disappear, there are a few steps you can take to lessen its negative impact on your sessions.

First things first, consider turning off your camera or getting creative with your background. On a basic level, turning off video might help with a crappy internet connection thats interrupting your therapy. But the video component might be more than just annoying for you. Some trans clients or clients with eating disorders, for example, might benefit from opting out, according to Amanda Fialk, Ph.D., chief of clinical services at The Dorm, an NYC-based treatment center for young adults. You might not like seeing yourself on a screen because you dont feel like youre in your own affirming body or it might exacerbate certain feelings you have about your body, she tells SELF. Consider going audio-only, loading a picture that you like instead of video, or adding a funny or pretty background to distract you from yourself if your video platform allows it.

Youve Just Got To Stay Positive

This communicates a deep misunderstanding of depression as a disease, and diminishes the persons experience, insinuating that the solution is a simple reframe. Depression is a deeply complex disease that affects not only thinking patterns and emotions, but the actual chemical makeup and structure of the brain.

Why Do We Become Depressed

Sometimes its instantly apparent what the cause is, but other times there isnt an obvious reason why you feel so down. It could be that youve lost something or someone, or it could stem from disappointment or frustration. Usually, there will be more than one reason why you suffer from depression, and these reasons differ from person to person.

Common reasons behind the development of depression include:

Read Also: Why Am I Depressed When I M Alone

How To Talk To A Therapist About Depression

Are you trying to find someone to talk to?

That can be tough.

We live in a busy world today. Everyone seems to be rushing about.

When you do get someone to stop for a moment to listen, however, sometimes they dont want to hear your concerns.

  • They might not understand exactly what youre trying to tell them, or what your concerns are.
  • Other times they dont know how to react.
  • Many times you get a few head nods, an I know how you feel, and nothing more.

That can be frustrating.

When you visit a therapist, however, youre talking with someone that wants to listen and is trained to understand your concerns.

Still, opening up can be hard. Lets go over a few ways about how to talk to a therapist about depression.

Suicidal Ideation And Stigma

Therapeutic Communication in Depression

Unfortunately there’s a lot of stigma around suicidal ideation, says Seth J. Gillihan, a clinical assistant professor of psychology in the psychiatry department at the University of Pennsylvania, author of The CBT Deck: 101 Practices to Improve Thoughts, Be in the Moment & Take Action in Your Life, and coauthor of A Mindful Year: 365 Ways to Find Connection and the Sacred in Everyday Life. I’ve definitely found in my clinical work that many people are reluctant to bring it up and will refer to it obliquely, hoping to convey their experience without saying something they think will cause me to have them committed to an inpatient facility. According to Gillihan, this is a common misunderstanding among clients experiencing suicidal thoughts, but theres no reason to worry. Trained professionals know that simply having suicidal thoughts is not a reason to have a person committed to the hospital.

Gillihan explains that suicidal thoughts might come up during episodes of depression or periods of severe stress and anxiety, and they look different for different people. For some, suicidal thoughts might feel like a dull, persistent hum, which can still be distressing but dont necessitate immediate intervention or alarm. Many people continue to function with some degree of suicidal thoughts and feelings, with a low enough risk that hospitalization is not only not needed but would be counterproductive.

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Why Opening Up In Therapy Is So Important

About 75% of people who go to therapy experience some benefit from it, according to the American Psychiatric Association.

The more you put into it, the more youll likely get out of it. Yet its a challenge to open up to someone who is, essentially, a complete stranger, says Dr. Andrew Schwehm, a licensed psychologist in New York City.

Even though you may be able to tell yourself logically that this is a safe space, its easy for that little part of your brain to say, Be careful! Dont say that! he says.

Thats when missed opportunities can occur. When you omit certain facts or distort the truth, a therapist may believe that an issue is more or less important than it actually is, which can impact the kind of support you receive.

The more they know, the better they can understand you and help you reach your goals.

Therapy is not a one-size-fits-all approach, which means that I want to know even the things you dont think are important so that I can best help you, Schwehm says.

Being honest in therapy can strengthen the therapeutic alliance and allow for a tailor-made treatment plan. It can also lay the groundwork for opening up about other painful or hard truths in the future. Even if it doesnt exactly get easier, at least the process will become more familiar.

It Can Be Scary To Talk About Your Suicidal Thoughts

For most people, the thought of telling anyone youre suicidal is terrifying. This is especially true when you think about telling your therapist in my experience, this is oftentimes because clients are afraid of being hospitalized.

This fear of hospitalization comes from a very real place. It wasnt even 50 years ago when this was happening frequently. The idea that forced hospitalization is the therapist go-to is often reinforced through movies, television, and novels, even to this day.

Im here to assure you that that is not the case anymore.

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Who To Talk To

Talking to friends and family about your depression can be a very positive experience. Ideally, theyll respond with encouragement and support. Think about people in your life who are thoughtful and caring the good listeners, the people you feel close to, comfortable with, and know you can trust.

If youre not sure about talking to friends or family, start with your doctor or a trusted counselor, teacher, or spiritual advisor. The important thing is to talk to someone about how you feel just saying it out loud might give you some relief.

If you dont feel you have someone in your life you can safely talk to or youd prefer to be anonymous, there are many helplines available with people ready to talk or text. Many helplines are available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Find more information in our Support Center.

Feeling Down And Being Depressed Is Not The Same

How To Tell If You’re Depressed

Symptoms of depression can affect a person physically, mentally, and emotionally. Common symptoms include trouble sleeping, appetite changes, and problems concentrating. They affect how you think, what you do, and how you feel physically. A depressed person may not feel motivated to do their usual activities. A person may feel persistent sadness, hopelessness, or emptiness, decreased energy, loss of interest in activities they once enjoyed, or want to isolate themselves from others. Relationships with family members, friends, and coworkers may be affected.

Someone experiencing symptoms of depression may not take care of themselves as they should. The way they think about their health, such as how to manage chronic issues such as arthritis, diabetes, or high blood pressure, may leave one feeling discouraged. When a depressed person feels hopeless, self-care is less of a priority and potentially increases personal health risks. Depression is a medical condition that affects you emotionally and physically. However, these elements are influenced by each other, leaving a drastic effect on a persons thoughts and actions.

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Can You Get Talking Therapies On The Nhs

You can get talking therapies like cognitive behavioural therapy on the NHS.

You can refer yourself directly to an NHS psychological therapies service without a referral from a GP.

Or you can get a referral from a GP if you prefer.

You may have to wait a few weeks for it to start and may not have much choice in who you see.

Help For Suicidal Thoughts

You want to be excited about life again. Right now, the depression is holding you back. The problem is that nothing youve tried has helped. In fact, youre feeling more hopeless than ever. Our therapists believe you CAN feel better and that you deserve the support and tools to get there. We have skilled therapists who have helped countless others overcome depression and create lives that are truly worth living.

So, if youre having suicidal thoughts, please call us at 328-2288 or reach out online to schedule a free consultation with one of our therapists. You dont have to keep fighting the weight of depression. Things CAN get better.

If you are concerned for your safety, please call 911 or the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255. You can also text TALK to 741741.

Other Counseling Services

In addition to counseling for depression, Aspire Counseling offers a wide range of mental health services online in Missouri and in our Columbia, MO counseling office. Our specialties include LGBTQ+ affirming therapy, PTSD treatment/trauma therapy, grief counseling, anxiety treatment & teen counseling.

About the Author

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How Long Does Therapy Take

While some people may benefit from short-term therapy, people with longstanding or treatment-resistant depression tend to derive more benefit from longer-term psychotherapy . Studies show long-term therapy for those conditions leads to greater improvement in depression symptoms and better life satisfaction and social functioning. It may also lower the risk of relapse after you get better. You and your therapist can watch for signs your depression might be getting worse. Over time, you’ll also learn about the patterns in your life that may trigger feelings of depression.

If you have treatment-resistant depression, you may have already tried therapy. Maybe you didnât feel like it worked. But it may be time to give it a second chance. Here are some things to consider before you try again:

Think about the reasons you didn’t find therapy useful in the past. Why didn’t it work? What did you need from therapy that you weren’t getting?

Do you want to tackle specific problems? Do you want to work through upsetting events from your past? Come up with goals.

Consider going back to your old therapist. Even if therapy didn’t work last time, that doesn’t mean the therapist was at fault. The experience may be different if you approach it with specific goals this time. Going back to a previous therapist may be easier, since they’ll already know your history and situation.

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How To Help Someone With Depression

Recognizing the Signs of Teen Depression

Dr. Dowd encourages, If they express needing or wanting help, suggest to them setting up an appointment with their PCP. They can get referrals to a therapist or psychiatrist or maybe their PCP feels comfortable treating the depression. There are also a host of websites and national organizations that can also help inform someone about depression if they are not ready to seek help. Suggest the Anxiety and Depression Association of America or the National Alliance on Mental Illness, both well-known organizations.

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When To Stop Therapy Or Counseling

When to stop therapy depends on you and your individual situation. Ideally, you will stop therapy when you and your therapist have decided that you have met your goals. However, you may feel at some point that you have gotten what you need out of therapy, even if your therapist feels differently.

Leaving therapy can be difficult. Remember that the therapeutic relationship is a strong bond, and ending this relationship is a loss even if treatment has been successful. Talk about this with your therapist. These feelings are normal. Its not uncommon for people to go back briefly to a therapist from time to time as needs arise.

What To Expect In Therapy Or Counseling

Every therapist is different, but there are usually some similarities in how therapy is structured. Normally, sessions will last about an hour, and take place around once a week. Although for more intensive therapy, they may be scheduled more often. Therapy is normally conducted in the therapists office, but therapists also work in hospitals and nursing homes, and in some cases will conduct home visits.

Expect a good fit between you and your therapist. Dont settle for bad fit. You may need to see one or more therapists until you feel understood and accepted.

Therapy is a partnership. Both you and your therapist contribute to the healing process. Youre not expected to do the work of recovery all by yourself, but your therapist cant do it for you either. Therapy should feel like a collaboration.

Therapy will not always feel pleasant. Painful memories, frustrations or feelings might surface. This is a normal part of therapy and your therapist will guide you through this process. Be sure to communicate with your therapist about how you are feeling.

Therapy should be a safe place. While at times youll feel challenged or face unpleasant feelings, you should always feel safe. If youre starting to feel overwhelmed or youre dreading your therapy sessions, talk to your therapist.

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How Can Talking To A Parent Help

It can feel like a big relief to have someone listen, hear you out, and show they care. Talking together can help you feel more hopeful. It lets you know you’re not alone. Someone believes in you and has your back.

Sometimes, a parent can help you see another angle to a problem you’re dealing with. They can give good advice. When you feel their support, it’s easier to think of ways to help yourself, too.

How To Talk To A Therapist About These Thoughts

How Do You Know If You Have Depression?

The best way to begin a discussion about these thoughts with a therapist is to just be as straightforward as possible. Personally, I’d find it more concerning if a person were evasive about what their thoughts have been, versus someone who says, To be honest, I’ve thought that maybe I should end it all. I don’t plan to, and I have a lot of reasons to live, but that thought does come to mind, he explains.

When you get proper care, you can recover and find good health again.

If youre still worried about talking bluntly with your therapist about your own suicidal thoughts, you can start by talking about why the topic gives you such pause. It can be helpful to start by discussing with them any concerns you have about speaking openly about suicide in order to give the therapist an opportunity to share with you how they see the two of you working on this together, adds Doreen Marshall, VP of programs at the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention . The therapist will want to know more about the thoughts you are having how specific, frequent, and intense they may be, what preceded them, and whether youve ever taken any action on those thoughts.

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What Are Signs Of Depression

It’s a very human desire to want to understand what is happening, particularly when it comes to someone special to us. However, especially after reading the preceding paragraphs, you should be mindful of the fact that there are many different levels of understanding. Assigning a label such as “depressed” to a complex, unique, thinking human being may be easy, but it’s not helpful or accurate.

The signs of depression in men can be very different from the signs of depression in women, while the various social norms and individual attitudes mean that a cookie-cutter approach to recognizing illnesses such as depression is going to be wrong 90% of the time. Most people don’t realize how widely people differ. Living in society tends to make us dress similarly, use language, in the same way, keep unusual opinions to ourselves and behave in the same ways as those around us. Scratch the surface, though, and you will discover how exceptional even unremarkable individuals can be. Psychological normality is a spectrum, not a standard.

However, there are some factors common to many who experience depression. If someone you know – or you yourself – is displaying several of the following, it might be time to think about what you can do to help. The term “depression” only applies to a condition that continues for two weeks or more – everyone has bad days now and again, but this isn’t a clinical syndrome.

Loss Of Appetite

Risky Behaviors

Talking To Parents About Depression

If you feel depressed, alone, or are having a problem you can’t solve, you need to reach out for help and support. Talk to a parent or to another trusted adult in your life, like a school counselor, teacher, pastor, or coach. Let them know what you’re going through.

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