Friday, March 29, 2024

I Just Want To Be Loved Depression

They Are Natural Philosophers

Do you want to die? Contemplating suicide? Please watch this video first.

Individuals living with depression have many questions and opinions about life, about happiness and about their significance on Earth. It is not enough to simply make money, or launch a successful career. It is not enough to simply live the American dream. It is not enough to simply live in the present and hope it all works out. Depression has a funny way of making your perspective broader and more inclusive.

Depressed individuals would love to make the world a better and more just place. They would love to have answers to all of lifes challenges and then would like to share that knowledge with as many people as possible. At times, this inquisitiveness can be an enemy, since it will create your questions than there are answers.

So, recognize that at their core, depressed individuals are intelligent, inquisitive, curious and creative. This is a positive, not a negative.

A Day In The Life With Depression

Steven Gans, MD is board-certified in psychiatry and is an active supervisor, teacher, and mentor at Massachusetts General Hospital.

Picture someone with depression. Whats the first image that comes to mind? Lying in bed all day? Crying? These arent wrong, and they may be fully accurate for me or someone else actively going through a depressive episode. But day-to-day life with chronic depression doesnt usually look like that. Not every day threatens to crush me, but many days I feel like I carry more weight on my shoulders than most.

I am in grad school right now to become a therapist, and one of the ways we assess the severity of ones mental health condition is to find out how much their symptoms affect their day-to-day life. As a person with depression, theres a low hum of how my daily functioning is affected some days. Other days, its a deep guttural internal scream, imperceptible to almost everyone else.

Like many others, I try to mask it as well as possible. I would never judge a client or a friend for feeling depressed, but theres obviously a double standard for myself, deeply rooted in internalized stigma.

Heres a look at what one day of life with depression looks like for me.

What Risks And Complications Can Depression Cause

Having depression can cause other problems. It can affect your mental health as well as your physical health, and it may affect other areas of your life too. For example, depression may cause:

  • disturbed sleep,
  • difficulties with work and your hobbies,
  • difficulties keeping contact with friends and families, or
  • suicidal thoughts or thoughts of self-harming.

Some people might also drink more alcohol to try and relieve depression. However, as we said in the previous section above, this can actually make depression worse.

If you have any of these problems, speak to your GP.

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Help Your Loved One Get Treatment For Depression

Somebody with depression may need help seeking care, both because of a sense of stigma or shame and because their illness makes it harder for them to manage tasks like finding a mental health provider or scheduling an appointment. Suggesting that you can do these things for them, remind them when the appointment is coming up, and accompany them to the visit can help them get treatment sooner rather than later.

If theyre hesitant to see a mental health professional such as a psychologist or psychiatrist, see if theyre willing to visit their primary care doctor, especially if this is someone they already know well and trust, Thienhaus says. Although its best to see someone specializing in mental health, the important part is getting connected to some form of help when needed.

You may also have to rethink the words you use to talk about depression treatment because different people may have distinct ways of viewing the condition, Thames says. Some people, for example, may not know to use the word depressed to describe how they feel, and might instead perceive their symptoms as being stressed out or not myself, for example.

Matching the language that the person can identify with is important when attempting to intervene, Thames says.

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Help Them With Other Options

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If your loved one isnt happy with their treatment or would like to try a different option, you can also help them seek different resources or services. You can find general advice in the Ask Us section of HeretoHelp. To find local services, call the BC Mental Health Support Line at 310-6789 or email us.

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What Loved Ones Can Do

Loved ones can gently hold and show love and commitment to the depressed person, try not to take on the persons reality, but also not argue with him or her about it. They can also gently remind the person that depression causes his or her perspective on everything to change, and he or she is unable to think outside of depression mode at the moment. It is a time for the person to avoid making decisions, or avoid doing anything significant that requires a nondepressed perspective. If this is a repeated experience for this person, it can be helpful to discuss all of this between episodes so he or she is more prepared when caught in the quicksand.

As someone who loves a person with depression, it can be emotionally difficult or stressful at times to support that person. It can be beneficial to focus on your own needs and self-care, and to reach out for help if you need it such as seeking the support of a counselor or therapist.

The preceding article was solely written by the author named above. Any views and opinions expressed are not necessarily shared by GoodTherapy.org. Questions or concerns about the preceding article can be directed to the author or posted as a comment below.

Things People With Depression Want You To Know

Depression is more than just feeling unhappy or fed up for a few days. Depression affects people in different ways and can cause a wide variety of symptoms. Young Scot, Dionne McFarlane, has shared her experiences of living with depression.

For people living depression it can be difficult for the people that are close to them to understand. Depression is the most common mental health issue in the UK. Through my experience of living with depression, this is what I think is important for people toknow and try to understand.

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How Can I Help Someone With Depression

Depression is a serious but treatable disorder that affects millions of people, from young to old and from all walks of life. It gets in the way of everyday life, causing tremendous pain, hurting not just those suffering from it but also impacting everyone around them.

If someone you love is depressed, you may be experiencing any number of difficult emotions, including helplessness, frustration, anger, fear, guilt, and sadness. These feelings are all normal. Its not easy dealing with a friend or family members depression. And if you neglect your own health, it can become overwhelming.

That said, your companionship and support can be crucial to your loved ones recovery. You can help them to cope with depression symptoms, overcome negative thoughts, and regain their energy, optimism, and enjoyment of life. Start by learning all you can about depression and how to best talk about it with your friend or family member. But as you reach out, dont forget to look after your own emotional healthyoull need it to provide the full support your loved one needs.

Understanding depression in a friend or family member

Depression is a serious condition. Dont underestimate the seriousness of depression. Depression drains a persons energy, optimism, and motivation. Your depressed loved one cant just snap out of it by sheer force of will.

They Like Opportunities For Fun And Laughter

6 Signs You’re Depressed, Not Sad

Whats the opposite of depression? Mania! It is a proven scientific phenomenon that laughter is good for the soul and the mind. Depressed individuals function the same way. I always like to remember the Jerry Seinfeld episode where Jerry has a sick friend in the hospital and tries to do his set to cheer him up and make him laugh.

Well, he ends up killing his friend because he made him laugh too hard. Dont worry you wont hurt your depressed loved ones or friends with your humor and laughter. Dish it out and dish it out often.

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Learn The Symptoms Of Depression

Depression signs and symptoms vary from person to person. They can include:

  • Feelings of sadness, tearfulness, emptiness or hopelessness.
  • Angry outbursts, irritability or frustration, even over small matters.
  • Loss of interest or pleasure in most or all normal activities, such as sex, hobbies or sports.
  • Insomnia or sleeping too much.
  • Tiredness and lack of energy, so even small tasks take extra effort.
  • Changes in appetite reduced appetite and weight loss or increased cravings for food and weight gain.
  • Anxiety, agitation or restlessness.
  • Slowed thinking, speaking or body movements.
  • Feelings of worthlessness or guilt, fixating on past failures or taking unnecessary blame for things.
  • Trouble thinking, concentrating, making decisions and remembering things.
  • Frequent or recurrent mention of death, suicidal thoughts, suicide attempts or suicide.

For many with depression, symptoms can be severe enough to cause noticeable problems in day-to-day activities, such as work, school, social activities or relationships with others. Others may generally feel miserable or unhappy without knowing why.

Children and teens may show depression by being irritable or cranky rather than sad. Clinical depression doesn’t require profound sadness. Rather it can be lack of positive emotion instead of intensely negative feelings.

You Have High Expectations

Having expectations in love is a good thing. However, sometimes our expectations can be too high, and set everyone else around us up for failure. If you find yourself alone and feeling unloved, it may be that your expectations for the people around you are almost impossible for them to meet. High expectations can also mean that youre hoping that other people loving you will help that unloved feeling dissipate. However, this might not always be the case. Love is a wonderful thing, but it doesnt mean all of your problems will be solved.

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How To Maintain A Healthy Relationship When Youre Depressed Love Isnt A State Of Perfect Caring It Is An Active Noun Like Struggle To Love Someone Is To Strive To Accept That Person Exactly The Way He Or She Is Right Here And Now ~fred Rogers When Youre Depressed Your Perception About Many Things Changesso How Does This Affect Your Relationships Im Thinking About This Today Becausedrum Roll Pleaseim A Little Depressed Now Im Not Depressed In The Suicidal I Want To Drive Off The Road Kind Of Way But In The Far Less Dramatic But Still Deeply Unpleasant Mild To Moderate Kind Of Way For Me One Of The Most Challenging Aspects To Feeling Like This Is That I Dont Feel As Connected As I Normally Dowith My Friends The World In General And With My Beautiful Kind Sweet Smart Sexy Husband And This Isnt Specific To Me This Is What Depression Is A Lack Of Feeling When Youre Depressed You Cant Access Feelings Of Self

1. Dont believe everything your mind says.

Your minds always telling you things that arent true, and this applies even more so when youre depressed. The more you can differentiate between you and your mind, the easier this gets. See if you can step back and think, Ah, look at what Im thinking now.

2. Dont make assumptions.

Watch out for assumptions your mind is making. Look at what youre mad about. Did they actually say that, or are you drawing conclusions yourself?

Chances are, youre just seeing a reflection of your own thoughts. And anyway, if anything your mind is telling you is real, itll still be there when youre not feeling so flat, by which time any conversation you do have will be infinitely easier and more productive.

3. Connect with your loved one over the bigger picture.

Try sharing the bigger picture of how youre feeling , rather than voicing your criticism of them. If there really is something bothering you, itll still be there when your depressed feelings have passed and I promise you, itll be a whole lot easier to talk about it then!

4. Know that your mind is very convincing.

Your mind may think it is absolutely imperative that you bring up the issue. And you know what? You might still decide to. Its your call. If you do find yourself in a discussion that you later regret, dont worry about it its all okay. It might be helpful to show this article to your partner.

5. This time will pass.

Kind wishes and loving relationships to you!

You Dont Really Have Anyone Close To You

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If you dont have strong friendships in your life You may feel that no one loves you. There are certain feelings that are closely connected with someone, even if its just a friendship that makes you feel warm and fuzzy inside.

If you dont feel like this It might be that you havent found that friend you can open up to. You may not be emotionally intimate. That might make you feel like youre missing something in your life. Try to open up more to those people in your life. And see if you need to work on the connections you have. Also, start saying yes to invitations and getting more out there are tons of potential friends waiting to meet.

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Encourage Treatment For Symptoms

People with depression may not recognize or acknowledge their symptoms. They may have difficulty seeing the point of getting treatment.

Here’s what you can do to help:

  • Talk to the person about what you’ve noticed and why you’re concerned.
  • Explain that depression is a complex condition, not a personal flaw or weakness and that effective treatment exists.
  • Suggest seeking help from a health care or a mental health professional, such as a licensed counselor, psychologist or psychiatrist. Often, the best place to start for a referral is your primary care provider, especially if a trusting relationship has been established.
  • Offer to help prepare a list of questions and notable changes to discuss at an initial consultation.
  • Express your willingness to help by setting up appointments, going along to them and attending family therapy sessions.

Your Expectations Are Too High

Some people dont realize that they are expecting too much from life and feeling loved. You may have set your expectations too high. It makes you feel like youre unloved even when youre not around.

Put yourself in a realistic mindset when you feel love. You cant expect that the feelings of other people who love you will instantly solve all your problems. If you have a habit of saying I just want to be loved all the time. This could be your problem. In that case, why not work on the relationship you have with yourself? Happiness in your own skin and self-love can also be fulfilled.

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What Are The Symptoms Of Depression And How Is It Diagnosed

The NHS recommends that you should see your GP if you experience symptoms of depression for most of the day, every day, for more than 2 weeks.

Doctors make decisions about diagnosis based on manuals. The manual used by NHS doctors is the International Classification of Diseases .

When you see a doctor they will look for the symptoms that are set out in the ICD-10 guidance. You do not have to have all of these to be diagnosed with depression. You might have just experience some of them.

Some symptoms of depression are:

  • low mood, feeling sad, irritable or angry,
  • having less energy to do certain things,
  • losing interest or enjoyment in activities you used to enjoy,
  • reduced concentration,

You may also find that with low mood you:

  • feel less pleasure from things,
  • feel more agitated,
  • find your thoughts and movements slow down, and
  • have thoughts of self-harm or suicide.

Your doctor should also ask about any possible causes of depression. For example, they may want to find out if youve experienced anything traumatic recently which could be making you feel this way.

There are no physical tests for depression. But the doctors may do some tests to check if you have any physical problems. For example, an underactive thyroid can cause depression.

On the NHS website, they have a self-assessment test which can help you to assess whether you are living with depression: www.nhs.uk/mental-health/conditions/clinical-depression/overview/

Make A List Of Your Advantages And Achievements

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Sit down and make a list of your accomplishments in life, your good points, and any other positive elements you can think of. It will be difficult at first, because most of us dont view growing up as easy! However, hold on and make sure you have a long list. If youre having a hard time Ask someone close to you for help, then add a new spot to your list every few days.

after a couple of weeks Sit down and read the list. Whenever you need a boost of confidence Read the list and remember how cool you are!

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What Treatment Should I Be Offered

The National Institute of Health and Care Excellence writes guidance on what treatment doctors should offer you. But your doctor does not have to give you these treatments. And the treatments may not be available in your area.

Different treatments may be available in your area. Your doctor might think these suit your symptoms more than the recommended treatments.

NICE recommend that depression is treated in different steps depending on how severe the condition is for you. The steps are as follows.

Step 1: Everyone who may have depression

Your doctor should offer you:

  • an assessment of your symptoms,
  • support, such as regular appointments in person or by telephone,
  • information on how to deal with your symptoms,
  • monitoring of your symptoms and follow-up, and
  • referral for further assessment and treatment if needed.

Step 2: Mild to moderate depression

Your doctor may offer you:

  • low-intensity interventions, such as self-help guided by the doctor or computerised cognitive behavioural therapy ,
  • physical activity programmes,
  • group cognitive behavioural therapy ,
  • medication if you have a history of moderate or severe depression, or you have had symptoms for a long time, and
  • referral for further assessment and treatment if needed.

Step 3: Moderate to severe depression, or mild to moderate depression when other treatments havent worked

Your doctor may suggest:

Step 4: Severe and complex depression or if your life is at risk Your doctor may suggest:

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