What To Say When Someone Is Depressed
Finding the Words to Help
Knowing what to say to someone who is depressed isnt always easy. While you may feel awkward and unsure at first, know that whatever you say doesnt have to be profound or poetic. It should simply be something that comes from a place of compassion and acceptance.
Try not to be dissuaded by worry over saying the wrong thing. Research has shown that people tend to withdraw when they are depressed, so reaching out to a friend in need is an important first step. If your friend isnt ready to talk, continue to offer your support by spending time with them and try to talk regularly, either in person, on the phone, or by text.
When you want to say more, but have a hard time expressing what you feel, try referencing the following statements someone who is depressed might find helpful to hear.
- Tell Them You Care
These two simple wordsI carecan mean so much to a person who may be feeling like the entire world is against them. A hug or a gentle touch of the hand can even get this message across. The important thing is to reach out and let the person know that they matter to you.
- Remind Them Youre There for Them
Depression can feel as though no one understands what you are feeling or even cares enough to try to understand, which can be isolating and overwhelming. When you reach out to a friend, letting them know that you are going to be there every step of the way can be very reassuring.
- Ask How You Can Help
- Urge Them to Talk With a Doctor
Assure Them That Theres Hope
One of the most important things about depression is that they need to learn to cope with it. And also to always remember that even if life seems tough now, it will get better.
It wont hurt forever, so its important to assure them that theres hope.
Help them realize that its an illness, not something they bring upon themselves .
Professionals can help and set up a plan to get things under control, and you can play your part by saying, Your feelings are real and I want to be here to help you through it. I believe that one day youll be okay, the darkness will go away, and your days will be bright again.
Its Ok To Not Feel Ok
Whether your friend or loved one is currently getting treatment or hasnt received a formal diagnosis, its OK if theyre not OK. Everyone has good and bad days. We all deserve some grace.
Sometimes, they might feel shame if theyre experiencing difficult feelings, so it might help to remind them that its OK to feel that way. Making it safe for them to express and sit with their real feelings in your presence can go a long way.
And just because right now is bad doesnt mean later will be.
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Just How To Deal With A Loss If Youre Already Bereaved
Dealing with a loss is never ever easy, however it can be even harder if you are currently bereaved. You might feel like you can stagnate on due to the pain that you feel for your enjoyed one. There are means to cope with your loss as well as not let it bewilder you.
Some individuals think that they require time to grieve before carrying on. Others believe that they need to concentrate on their life as well as the things that make them satisfied once again. There is no right or wrong way to deal with a loss, but there is a way that will benefit you.
Symptoms And Signs That Warrant Expert Help
Admission to hospital can occur voluntarily or involuntarily. Involuntary admission or a forced admission against someones will is only used as a last resort if the persons life or other peoples lives are in danger. Hospital admission may be needed for people that:
- Experience hallucinations
- Have not slept or eaten for days
- Cannot care for themselves on a daily basis
- Have symptoms that are interfering with their life
- Need specialist treatment such as electroconvulsive therapy
- Have significant problems with alcohol or other substances
- Whose symptoms have not improved or who have relapsed with their current treatment.
Can You Think Of Anything Contributing To What Youre Experiencing
This can be a very gentle way of allowing your loved one to arrive at their own conclusions for why theyre experiencing a depressive episode. It lets them have their revelation on their terms without any leading or presumptive remarks.
This might also be a good time to ask whether theyd like to talk with a mental health professional.
Just dont push or ask about sensitive experiences that may make your loved one feel exposed, or anxious to come up with something.
For most people, its not one thing that triggers a depressive episode. There are many triggers or reasons that cause or worsen depression.
And remember, for many people, theres nothing tangible that can explain why they feel the way they feel, and thats OK.
Is There Something I Can Do For You
So, the best way to really support someone is to offer something specific and tangible, like, Im picking up groceries, what can I get you?
If someone is embarrassed by or resistant to offers of help, reword it so it sounds like theyre doing you a favor. For example:
- My dog is lonely. Is it OK if I walk your dog, too, so he has someone to run around with?
- I promised my kids a playdate this weekend. Can I pick up your kids and take them all to the park for a couple of hours?
Also Check: World Health Organization Depression Statistics
Don’t Jump Into Problem
“If the depressed person wishes to talk about what is on his/her/their mind then listen,” says Talley. “Don’t offer solutions unless this is requested. Of course, it is fine to say something like ‘Do you mind if I suggest something?’ but avoid making it a problem-solving seminar.”
Leaf agrees. “Avoid turning the conversation toward you or any advice you have. Be present, listen to what they have to say, and stay focused on their experience unless they specifically turn to you for advice.”
And if they do ask for some insight, you can talk about how finding a therapist is a monumental step in recovery . Remind them that there are experts that have a multitude of tools to help them feel better.
Tips For Overcoming Depression
Depression can feel impossible. You donât have to give in to depression and think that things wonât get better. Instead, use these tips to improve your outlook:
- Get help from a mental health professional.
- Maintain activities that you once enjoyed.
- Keep up with friends and family members by talking regularly.
- Get some exercise, even if you just go for a short walk.
- Keep a routine of getting enough sleep and maintaining a healthy diet.
- Adjust your expectations so you can cope with depression.
- Donât drink or do drugs as a way of treating your depression.â
- Search for local depression resources.
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Its Ok That You Feel This Way There Is Hope
There is often a sense of shame or embarrassment on the part of the depressed person. Many people with depression sometimes feel that there is something wrong with them, or that they have no real reason to feel depressed. On the other hand, there are those who may feel there are good reasons to be depressed.
Let Mom or Dad know that its OK for them to feel the way that theyre feeling, and that its not their fault. Depression is a legitimate health condition that affects millions of people, and countless individuals have learned to manage mental illness with the help of therapy, medication, and lifestyle changes your mom or dad can, too. Make sure that they know help is available and its nothing to be ashamed about.
Online Treatment And Counseling Threats
Online therapy as well as therapy risks are the prospective threats of online treatment as well as therapy.
Online therapy threats can be split right into 3 groups: confidentiality, safety and security, as well as effectiveness. On the internet therapy risks are the potential dangers associated with on-line therapy. These risks can be split right into three groups: discretion, safety and security, and also performance.
The privacy of online treatment is a danger when sharing delicate details with a therapist that is not face to face. Furthermore, the safety and security of online therapy can be compromised by cyberpunks or various other kinds of harmful strikes on the clients info. The performance of online treatment has actually been wondered about because it is difficult to know if specialists are really following ideal methods when they have no physical call with their clients.
Despair is not just a psychological feedback to loss it is additionally a physical response that can influence your body in many means.
Grief therapy supplies emotional assistance for those who are experiencing despair. For those experiencing grief, it is essential to discover a means to sidetrack themselves from their ideas so they wont be lost in their despair.
Pain can be experienced for lots of various reasons, consisting of death, separation, dependency, ailment, relocation, as well as work loss. Things To Say To Help A Depressed Friend
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What Not To Say To Someone With Depression
While offering support and kind words to someone with depression, there are sayings and phrases that are best avoided. Primarily, avoid turning the focus on you, minimizing what they are going through, and offering unsolicited directives or solution-finding.
Here are six things you shouldnt say to someone with depression:
Recognizing Depression Symptoms In A Loved One
Family and friends are often the first line of defense in the fight against depression. Thats why its important to understand the signs and symptoms of depression. You may notice the problem in a depressed loved one before they do, and your influence and concern can motivate them to seek help.
Be concerned if your loved one:
Doesnt seem to care about anything anymore. Has lost interest in work, sex, hobbies, and other pleasurable activities. Has withdrawn from friends, family, and other social activities.
Expresses a bleak or negative outlook on life. Is uncharacteristically sad, irritable, short-tempered, critical, or moody talks about feeling helpless or hopeless.
Frequently complains of aches and pains such as headaches, stomach problems, and back pain. Or complains of feeling tired and drained all the time.
Sleeps less than usual or oversleeps. Has become indecisive, forgetful, disorganized, and out of it.
Eats more or less than usual, and has recently gained or lost weight.
Drinks more or abuses drugs, including prescription sleeping pills and painkillers, as a way to self-medicate how theyre feeling.
Read Also: How To Manage Depression And Anxiety
When Can You Diagnose Someone With Clinical Depression
Criteria for Major Depressive Disorder
- Depressed mood or a loss of interest or pleasure in daily activities for more than two weeks.
- Mood represents a change from the persons baseline.
- Impaired function: social, occupational, educational.
- Specific symptoms, at least 5 of these 9, present nearly every day:
Now weve painted a fairly clear picture of what depression looks like. Lets get to the talking bit.Here are examples of sentences people use while talking with people while they speak of their depression or know that said person is depressed.
Lets go through a bunch of DO NOTs first and then in the next post, some DOs.
Saying Nothing At All Can Be A Gift
Sometimes silence really is golden and one of the best things you can do is just showing up and being present. What might feel like a small, meaningless gesture to you most likely feels like an intimate, caring gesture to your loved one in need.
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The Risk Of Suicide Is Real
What to do in a crisis situation
If you believe your loved one is at an immediate risk for suicide, do NOT leave them alone.
In the U.S., dial 911 or call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK.
In other countries, call your countrys emergency services number or visit IASP to find a suicide prevention helpline.
It may be hard to believe that the person you know and love would ever consider something as drastic as suicide, but a depressed person may not see any other way out. Depression clouds judgment and distorts thinking, causing a normally rational person to believe that death is the only way to end the pain theyre feeling.
Since suicide is a very real danger when someone is depressed, its important to know the warning signs:
- Talking about suicide, dying, or harming oneself a preoccupation with death
- Expressing feelings of hopelessness or self-hate
- Acting in dangerous or self-destructive ways
- Getting affairs in order and saying goodbye
- Seeking out pills, weapons, or other lethal objects
- A sudden sense of calm after depression
If you think a friend or family member might be considering suicide, dont wait, talk to them about your concerns. Many people feel uncomfortable bringing up the topic but it is one of the best things you can do for someone who is thinking about suicide. Talking openly about suicidal thoughts and feelings can save a persons life, so speak up if youre concerned and seek professional help immediately!
Little Things You Can Do To Help Someone Who Is Depressed
Living with depression can be lonely, scary and difficult to talk about, and watching someone you care about struggle is tough, too but when 1 in 6 people report experiencing depression every week , it’s likely we all know someone who could do with a bit of support.
Friends and family can often feel helpless, not knowing how to help someone with depression, but there are small gestures you can do – and things that you can say to help someone with depression – that could mean a lot to a loved one.
In order to help someone who is depressed, it’s important to know what they might be going through. “Depression is a mood disorder that causes a persistent feeling of sadness and loss of interest in pleasurable activities and hobbies,” explains psychotherapist Sharnade George of Cultureminds Therapy. “People with depression might not be their usual self, or lack energy or appetite. You may also notice mood swings in them, or that they’re withdrawing from daily life, friends and family,” she adds.
So, what’s the best way to help a friend with depression? Here are some of the ways you can put into practice today…
Read Also: How To Live A Happy Life With Depression
You Can Move Forward In The Face Of Your Depression
Some people believe that having depression makes them weak or broken. The truth is that every day they get out of bed, go to work, or move forward while living with depression is proof of their ability to keep going.
Depression can feel like a weight on your chest. For some people, it can be a disability.
However, every day that someone keeps going while theyre living with depression is proof they can keep going.
Youre Not Alone Im With You
Being with someone and reassuring them that theyre not alone is one of the greatest things you can do for a depressed person. And youve got to mean it: if you tell them that theyre not alone, and then you leave to go shopping, they will get the message that your words are just meaningless. But telling them theyre not alone and then showing them, by sitting next to them on the couch, by staying up late with them when theyre crying, by walking with them to appointments or just going for a strollall of that shows that you mean it, and that can have a real impact.
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We Can Try Again Tomorrow
Sometimes depression just ruins a day completely and the person feels like a failure and a waste. Telling them that not only can they try again tomorrow, but we can try againtogethergives them hope, and nothing is stronger than hope when youre trying to overcome depression. Sometimes a day is going to be bad, but that doesnt mean we need to give up. Tomorrow will always come with fresh new possibilities, and you can face them together.
What Are The 4 Major Types Of Sorrow With Examples
The 4 major sorts of despair are:
- Severe sorrow: This is a sudden as well as unexpected loss. It can arise from a fatality, divorce, or job loss.
- Chronic despair: This is a long-term grieving process that may last for several years or years.
- Residual despair: This type of grieving process occurs when the individual has actually had an unresolved loss as well as surface areas after another loss.
- Difficult grief: This type of mourning procedure occurs when there is a considerable amount of regret, anger, as well as denial included with the fatality.
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