Minimizing Or Comparing Their Experience
If your friend talks about their depression, you might want to say things like, I understand, or Weve all been there. But if youve never dealt with depression yourself, this can minimize their feelings.
Depression goes beyond simply feeling sad or low. Sadness usually passes fairly quickly, while depression can linger and affect mood, relationships, work, school, and all other aspects of life for months or even years.
Comparing what theyre going through to someone elses troubles or saying things like, But things could be so much worse, generally doesnt help.
Your friends pain is whats real to them right now and validating that pain is what may help them most.
Say something like, I cant imagine how hard that is to deal with. I know I cant make you feel better, but just remember you arent alone.
Why Is Dealing With Depression So Difficult
Depression drains your energy, hope, and drive, making it difficult to take the steps that will help you to feel better. Sometimes, just thinking about the things you should do to feel better, like exercising or spending time with friends, can seem exhausting or impossible to put into action.
Its the Catch-22 of depression recovery: The things that help the most are the things that are the most difficult to do. There is a big difference, however, between something thats difficult and something thats impossible. While recovering from depression isnt quick or easy, you do have more control than you realizeeven if your depression is severe and stubbornly persistent. The key is to start small and build from there. You may not have much energy, but by drawing on all your reserves, you should have enough to take a walk around the block or pick up the phone to call a loved one, for example.
Taking the first step is always the hardest. But going for a walk or getting up and dancing to your favorite music, for example, is something you can do right now. And it can substantially boost your mood and energy for several hourslong enough to put a second recovery step into action, such as preparing a mood-boosting meal or arranging to meet an old friend. By taking the following small but positive steps day by day, youll soon lift the heavy fog of depression and find yourself feeling happier, healthier, and more hopeful again.
Look At External Factors
Sometimes external factors kill motivation, trigger negative emotions, and contribute to clinical depression. Lets say you are stuck in a dead end job. The only motivation you have to do good work is to keep your job and put food on the table. This is obviously not as stimulating as an environment where you can eventually move up and have increased responsibilities if you work hard.
Here are a few more common situations that might be hurting your motivation:
- Having romantic partners, friends, or family members who abuse you, put you down, or dont treat you with respect
- Abuse or bullying in the workplace or school
- A debilitating health issue or chronic illness
- Being a victim of discrimination or sexism
Think about whether one or more of these factors are present in your life. Then examine their effect on your ability to feel motivated.
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Offer To Help With Everyday Tasks
With depression, day-to-day tasks can feel overwhelming. Things like laundry, grocery shopping, or paying bills can begin to pile up, making it hard to know where to start.
Your friend may appreciate an offer of help, but they also might not be able to clearly say what they need help with.
So, instead of saying Let me know if theres anything I can do, consider saying, What do you most need help with today?
If you notice their refrigerator is empty, say Can I take you grocery shopping, or pick up what you need if you write me a list? or Lets go get some groceries and cook dinner together.
If your friend is behind on dishes, laundry, or other household chores, offer to come over, put some music on, and tackle a specific task together. Simply having company can make the work seem less daunting.
Say What You Have Practised
When youre ready, just go for it. Say what youve practised, and if you feel more comfortable taking your notes with you, then do so. If you get tongue-tied or shaky then dont worry. Its perfectly acceptable to tell the person that youre finding this difficult. If you find that youre becoming a bit overwhelmed, then just take a break and come back to the conversation later.
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How To Prepare For Your Appointment
You must be registered with a local practice to make an appointment. It’s easy and quick to register with a practice of your choice in your catchment area , and see any of their GPs.
Finding the best GP for you
You can change GPs whenever you want. You may wish to consider changing GP for the following reasons:
- It may be more convenient to find a practice that offers specialised counselling or mental health services. You can phone the practice to ask what they offer or find information for English practices on the NHS Choices website.
- If you feel that you have a bad relationship with your practice or do not get on with your GP, you may wish to look for other practices in your area which offer a better or friendlier service. England’s NHS Choices website lists customer reviews and provides a patient survey score for each practice. The ‘Quality Practice Award’ is only given to the very best practices in England, while all practices must have ‘Practice Accreditation’.
You can ask the receptionist if there is a GP with a specialist interest in mental health and request to see them. It is possible to see a male or female GP. You do not need to tell the receptionist why you are making an appointment. You can just say you’d prefer not to say.
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What If I Am Not Happy With My Treatment
If you are not happy with your treatment you can:
- talk to your doctor to see if they can suggest changes,
- get an advocate to help you speak your doctor,
- ask for a second opinion if you feel it would help,
- contact Patient Advice and Liaison Service and see whether they can help, or
- make a complaint.
There is more information about these options below.
Advocacy
An advocate is independent from the NHS. They are free to use. They can be useful if you find it difficult to get your views heard.
There are different types of advocates available. Community advocates can support you to get a health professional to listen to your concerns. And help you to get the treatment that you would like. They arent available in all areas.
You can ask an advocate to help you make a complaint. Advocates that do this are called NHS complaints advocates. They are free to use and don t work for the NHS. They re available in all areas.
You can search online to search for a local advocacy service. If you cant find a service you can call our advice service 0808 801 0525 . You can email us too at . We will look for you.
Second opinion
Talk to your doctor about your treatment to see if you can resolve the problem with them first. If you dont agree with their decisions about diagnosis or treatment, you could ask for a second opinion. You are not legally entitled to a second opinion, but your doctor might agree to it if it would help with treatment options.
‘PALS’
Complaints
- Advocacy by clicking here.
Wait Until It Feels Comfortable
Take your time and do it when it feels right. When you feel ready, the best way to start is to tell them you have something important that you want to talk about, so they know not to take the conversation lightly. Also, its important to be clear whether or not you want them to keep the information to themselves at this stage.
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Signs You Should Talk With Your Doctor About Depression
Havent felt like yourself lately or longer than just lately? When you feel tired all the time, disinterested in the people, places and activities you love and altogether fatigued in body and mind, you might be facing depression. But you dont have to struggle with it alone, and you can receive help.
Depression isnt a dirty word. Its an extremely common mental health condition almost 17 million Americans have major depressive disorder and most importantly, you can overcome it. Depression might come and go during your lifetime, but its nothing to be ashamed of, and its fully treatable.
If you feel like you might have depression, its normal to feel nervous talking about it. However, your health care team wants to help you feel like yourself again. Your physician, as well as the whole team of compassionate people at the AdventHealth Neuroscience Institute, are here to talk through your symptoms with you non-judgmentally and help you get the treatment that works.
First Things First: Do They Have Clinical Depression
Sadness, just like happiness, is a reaction and can be a state of mind. Depression, though, starts in the synapses of the brain and affects hormones.
Depression doesnt ease up. It goes beyond feeling sad and isnt necessarily tied to a preceding circumstance, like sadness sometimes is. Depression has definitive symptoms, causing body and brain changes, that others can sometimes see.
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How To Show You Care
What do you say to someone whos depressed? All too often, its the wrong thing.
People still have such a cloudy idea of what mental illness is, Kathleen Brannon, of Herndon, Virginia, tells Health.
Sometimes people will say, Oh, youre depressed? Yeah, Ive been depressed, and you realize just the way they say it that, nooo, its not quite the same thing. Its not just that Im feeling sad or blue.
Below is a list of helpful things to tell someone battling depression, followed by what not to saycourtesy of the Depression Alliance, a national organization that campaigns to end the stigma of depression, provides information on depression treatment options, and raises awareness of what it means to live with the depression.
Choosing The Right Online Therapy Service For You
Before you sign up for an online therapy service, do a little research. Take a look at how the company screens its counselors and if their certification checks out. You can also look at online testimonials by customers to get an idea about the quality of service.
Youll want to decide which types of counseling you wantchat, video, or emailand if theyre available through the service. If youre interested in using the service on your smartphone, see if the company has an app and if youre allowed to have sessions with your counselor by chat on your phone.
In addition, check what type of security they provide and if your chats will be encrypted, and if youll have the ability to remain anonymous to your counselor.
Look at the price also, and see if it fits your budget. In addition, see if you can quit the membership at any time, or if its binding.
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If you are in crisis and need immediate help, call 911 or the National Suicide Prevention hotline:
Signs To Notice When Feeling Depressed
When you feel depressed, you may experience one or multiple symptoms of depression. Such feelings are persistent, and its not easy to shake them off. Since symptoms affect people differently, they should be a red flag to see your doctor or mental health professional. Signs of depression include the following:
Why Does Depression Happen?
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Taking Care Of Yourself
Theres a natural impulse to want to fix the problems of people we care about, but you cant control someone elses depression. You can, however, control how well you take care of yourself. Its just as important for you to stay healthy as it is for the depressed person to get treatment, so make your own well-being a priority.
Remember the advice of airline flight attendants: put on your own oxygen mask before you assist anyone else. In other words, make sure your own health and happiness are solid before you try to help someone who is depressed. You wont do your friend or family member any good if you collapse under the pressure of trying to help. When your own needs are taken care of, youll have the energy you need to lend a helping hand.
Speak up for yourself. You may be hesitant to speak out when the depressed person in your life upsets you or lets you down. However, honest communication will actually help the relationship in the long run. If youre suffering in silence and letting resentment build, your loved one will pick up on these negative emotions and feel even worse. Gently talk about how youre feeling before pent-up emotions make it too hard to communicate with sensitivity.
Where Can I Find More Information About Treatments Including Non
Find out more about treatments such as medication and psychotherapy. Exercise and other lifestyle changes can also reduce symptoms, improve wellbeing and benefit your recovery.
Other non-drug therapies that can help include:
A number of digital mental health resources are available at the Australian Government’s Head to Health website or Tools and Apps on ReachOut.com.
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What Can I Do To Help Today
Depression often causes fatigue, trouble sleeping, and a lack of motivation. Sometimes just getting out of bed can be hard.
Asking what you can do can really help them through their day.
Maybe theyre not eating well and you can pick up dinner. Maybe they need a morning call or text to ensure they get to work on time.
Sometimes you just need to listen. Helping doesnt have to be a huge, drastic effort. It can be as simple as picking up a phone, sharing a meal, or driving them to an appointment.
what Not to say
Just remember: Advice isnt the same as asking for help. If they ask for your advice, give it if you so choose. But dont offer them helpful solutions or statements that seem like a cure for their depression. This can feel judgmental or not empathetic.
DONT say:
- Just think happy thoughts. I dont understand what you have to be so sad about.
- Everything will be OK, I promise.
- I cut out sugar and I was cured! You should try it.
- You just need to snap out of this.
- So many people out there are worse off than you.
How To Motivate Yourself When You Are Depressed 7 Motivation Strategies To Get You Through Depression
How to motivate yourself when you are depressed? A popular misconception is that we need to have enough inspiration to do something. So, you wait for the day when you can feel more motivated and start participating in life.
You wait to get enough motivational jolt to feel more like yourself again. But, we forget that motivation isnt something that appears out of nowhere one must nurture it. You must do something to rekindle motivation.
Here are seven proven, effective strategies to increase your motivation and get you through depression.
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