How To Notice If You Need Help
Its common to dismiss our own feelings or changes in behavior as nothing or just a rough patch. But how can you notice when your sadness or depressive feelings are becoming more than just temporary? Some things you should ask yourself and keep asking:
- Is your sadness getting worse?
- Is your sadness persistent, or doesnt seem to ever go away?
- Do you get sad at a specific time of year, month, or day?
- Do you experience sudden fluctuations in mood?
- Do you ever experience feelings of euphoria, or feeling unreasonably energetic or high, before or after feeling depressed?
- Did you experience a big life change before you started feeling sad? This could be the loss of a loved one, a change in job, school, or living situation, etc.
- Do you ever have thoughts of intentionally hurting yourself for any reason, such as to punish yourself or to feel something?
- Do you ever have thoughts about ending your life or wanting to die? Passive or active suicidal thoughts, like I wish I were dead, are cause for concern and should be talked about with someone you trust. If you feel actively suicidal its important to talk to your doctor, a therapist, or other authority immediately.
Remember, sadness is normal, but if at any point your depressive symptoms are getting in the way of how you live your life, or how you perform in work, school, or in your relationships, please see a professional for help.
Getting Out Of A Funk: How To Help Yourself Through Depression
Everyone has off days where they feel tired, irritable, and sad. Its normal to feel sadness as a response to challenging life events, loss, or changes, but sometimes these feelings can stick around for a while if left unaddressed and make it difficult for you to get through each day.
Heres how you can tell when youre in a funk or maybe even experiencing a mild depression as well as what you can do to help yourself feel better.
What Happens When You Are Depressed
Depression makes you cynical and is deeply self-damaging. Depressed people only hurt themselves more. Killing need not necessarily mean physical killing. For a man who goes out with the sword and kills someone, his ego is not as sensitive it does not need as much nurturing as a depressed mans ego. The violent man can be very easily settled. Have you seen this on the streets? When people get into a fight, if there is one man with a little wisdom who just handles them right, those people, who are trying to kill each other one moment, will drop it and become friends and go off the next moment. But this is not so with the depressed person. He will carry this for life. Whether they do it consciously or not, these people go on sharpening their knife and cutting their own heart. Why will a person go on hurting himself? Generally it is to get sympathy. For a very depressed person, normal sympathy is not sufficient someone should bleed with him.
Now what is there in you that can get hurt? If I beat your body with a stick, the body will get hurt that is different. Otherwise, what is it that gets hurt within you? The mind and the inner nature cannot get hurt. It is only the ego that gets hurt. If you say I want to grow, it means trampling your ego and going ahead beyond this.
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Therapy And The Big Picture In Depression Treatment
One of the hallmarks of depression is feeling overwhelmed and having trouble focusing. Therapy helps you step back and see what might be contributing to your depression and how you can make changes. Here are some of the big picture themes that therapy can help with:
Relationships.Understanding the patterns of your relationships, building better relationships, and improving current relationships will help reduce isolation and build social support, important in preventing depression.
Setting healthy boundaries. If you are stressed and overwhelmed, and feel like you just cant say no, you are more at risk for depression. Setting healthy boundaries in relationships and at work can help relieve stress, and therapy can help you identify and validate the boundaries that are right for you.
Handling lifes problems. Talking with a trusted therapist can provide good feedback on more positive ways to handle lifes challenges and problems.
What If My Symptoms Dont Improve
If youre not responding to treatment, you may live with treatment resistant depression. This is when your symptoms have not improved after at least 2 standard treatments. This can also be known as treatment-refractory depression.
There is currently no official criteria used to diagnose treatment resistant depression.
What treatment is available for treatment-resistant depression?There are treatment options for treatment resistant depression. Even if antidepressants have not worked already for you, your doctor may suggest a different antidepressant from a different class.
The new antidepressant you are offered will depend on the first antidepressant you were given.
Sometimes your doctor can prescribe a second type of medication to go with your antidepressant. This can sometimes help the antidepressant work better than it does by itself.
Where antidepressants have not worked, your doctor may suggest talking therapies, ECT or brain stimulation treatments. See the previous section for more information on these.
What is an implanted vagus nerve stimulator, and how is it used in treatment resistant depression?If you live with treatment resistant depression, and youve not responded to other treatments, you may be able ask for an implanted vagus nerve stimulator.
Please speak to your doctor if youre interested in this treatment and for more information. You may be able to get this treatment funded through an Individual Funding Request.
- NHS – Your Rights by clicking here.
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Managing Anxiety And Depression
A therapist can offer more guidance on treatment options for anxiety and depression, but you can also take steps to cope with symptoms on your own.
The strategies below may not always help, but trying different approaches at different times can help you learn more about what works for you. That insight can guide you toward a personalized toolbox of coping strategies, so you always have options to consider when feeling distressed or overwhelmed.
Your therapist can also offer suggestions for new strategies to try, plus offer tips on putting them into practice.
Learn Your Warning Signs
The first step is to develop your ability to sense the beginning of a depressive episode. The earlier you notice depression creeping in, the sooner you can take proactive steps.
What are your early signals does your sleep pattern or appetite change? Do you become apathetic? Are you more irritable? Do you withdraw from loved ones?
Once you become aware of your particular signs, take action early, and youll be more successful in heading off depression.
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Learn How To Stop Negative Thoughts
Depression doesn’t just make you feel bad, it can also cause you to think more negatively. Changing those negative thoughts, however, can improve your mood.
Cognitive behavioral therapy is a type of therapy that works to alter common patterns of negative thinking called cognitive distortions in order to eliminate depression. There are also many self-help books, apps, and online courses that can help you learn how to change your unhealthy thinking patterns.
The symptoms of depression, such as fatigue and difficulty concentrating, make procrastination tempting.
Putting things off fuels depression. It can lead to increased guilt, worry, and stress.
It’s important to set deadlines and manage your time well. Establish short-term goals and work hard to get the most important things done first. Each task you successfully complete will help you break through the habit of procrastination.
Almost Nothing Sparks Your Interest
Depression commonly involves a decrease in your energy levels and a loss of pleasure in your favorite hobbies and other things you usually enjoy. As you work toward recovery, youll usually find your interest in these activities slowly begins to return, along with your energy.
With worsening depression, you might notice the opposite.
It may not just seem difficult to find the motivation for exercise, socializing, and other hobbies. Anhedonia, or difficulty experiencing joy and pleasure, is a core symptom of depression.
You might also have trouble mustering up enough energy to go to work or take care of basic responsibilities, like paying bills or preparing meals. Even necessary self-care, like showering and brushing your teeth, might feel beyond your current abilities.
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When To See A Doctor
Those experiencing symptoms of depression should seek assistance from a healthcare provider. Depression can worsen without treatment and affect a persons quality of life.
A doctor or mental health professional will discuss treatment options to help the person manage their depression and carry on with their daily life.
In severe cases, depression can lead to thoughts of suicide or physically harming oneself.
Any suicidal thoughts or statements about not wanting to live should be taken seriously. In times of crisis, a person should seek help from a hospital emergency department.
Help is also available 24/7 from the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline by calling 988 or 1-800-273-TALK , or by visiting the Lifelines website.
It is possible to treat depression. Treatments for depression include antidepressants and psychotherapy, of which there are many different types.
However, different people may respond better to different treatment methods. As such, people may wish to speak with a doctor about trying different methods until they find the one most suitable for them.
It may be helpful to remember that many treatments may take some time to reach their full effects, so people may not experience results immediately.
Someone on the road to recovery after receiving a proper diagnosis may find it helps to speak out to loved ones and make healthy changes to their diet and lifestyle.
Learn more
How To Help Someone Else Who’s Feeling Depressed
If someone you know says they are feeling overwhelmed or helpless, there are things you can do to support them.
Be a good listener. Listening is more important than giving advice. You probably can’t fix your friend or family member’s problems, but you can show them that you’re supportive by listening with a compassionate and empathetic ear.
Encourage them to get help. If someone has been overwhelmed for a while, they may be depressed. You can encourage them to see their doctor or seek the help of a therapist.
Be an example. Exercise regularly and make healthy lifestyle choices to show your friend or family member that a positive outlook is possible.
Set boundaries and be realistic. Set boundaries that relate to how much you can help someone and then stick to those boundaries. That will help you avoid getting burned out while helping your loved one.
Help out. When someone is feeling overwhelmed, they may find it challenging to do daily tasks. If you notice some dishes in the sink or an overflowing trash can, help out if you are able.
Pay attention. Look out for the following behaviors that might indicate suicidal ideation:
- Talking about suicide
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A Blog Series Guiding Folks Who Are Depressed
I often get letters from individuals who are depressed asking me what they should do. If you go on sites like WebMD, they will tell you that depression is a serious medical condition and that you should consult with your doctor. As such, I will assume you have already heard that piece of advice. Here, I attempt to offer folks something more.
What follows is a 15-part blog series that I have developed to serve as a guide for folks who are feeling depressed or who think they might be and are wondering what to do about it. It is written mostly from a self-help perspective. You do not need to be in therapy . It is probably best suited for folks in the mild-to-moderate range of clinical depression and who have enough mental energy to read and think things through.
It does not try to sell you anything, although it does recommend several books you might consider. It also does not promise you a quick and easy cure. It is a guide that is divided into two broad parts. The first half of the series attempts to help you first understand what depression is, and use that to connect with understanding your situation and who you are as a person. Once we go through the steps of understanding depression and how it fits for what is going on with you, then the second half moves on to explore principles of adaptive living.
These are the guides for doing things differently in the areas:
Don’t Allow Yourself To Be Limited By Your Depression
Yes, you are depressed. I know that place way too well, and I work my butt off to stay out of the D-zone. Here are 10 little things that will give you a lift. You may not think you have the energy to do them, but, trust me, you can. Its as easy as reading this post.
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Taking Care Of Yourself
Theres a natural impulse to want to fix the problems of people we care about, but you cant control someone elses depression. You can, however, control how well you take care of yourself. Its just as important for you to stay healthy as it is for the depressed person to get treatment, so make your own well-being a priority.
Remember the advice of airline flight attendants: put on your own oxygen mask before you assist anyone else. In other words, make sure your own health and happiness are solid before you try to help someone who is depressed. You wont do your friend or family member any good if you collapse under the pressure of trying to help. When your own needs are taken care of, youll have the energy you need to lend a helping hand.
Speak up for yourself. You may be hesitant to speak out when the depressed person in your life upsets you or lets you down. However, honest communication will actually help the relationship in the long run. If youre suffering in silence and letting resentment build, your loved one will pick up on these negative emotions and feel even worse. Gently talk about how youre feeling before pent-up emotions make it too hard to communicate with sensitivity.
You Notice Changes In Eating And Sleeping Patterns
Depression often affects appetite and sleep habits.
When it comes to appetite changes, you might find yourself eating more than usual. You could also lose your appetite entirely and feel as if you have to force yourself to eat.
Sleep changes often happen on a similar spectrum. You could have a hard time staying awake and feel exhausted enough to sleep all day but you could also struggle to fall asleep or wake up often throughout the night.
Trouble sleeping at night can mean you need to nap during the day to catch up, so you might end up drifting off at unusual times. This can affect your energy and concentration and further disrupt your sleep.
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Make Time For Rest And Relaxation
Mental health conditions like depression and anxiety can affect your energy and motivation, which often only adds to feelings of guilt and worry.
Remember, though: Depression and anxiety are health conditions. If you had the flu, youd need time to rest, right? Mental health symptoms require recovery time, too.
Instead of fixating on the things you think you should be doing, honor your needs by taking time for activities that soothe and relax you. Maybe this includes things like:
- watching a comforting movie or TV show
- re-reading a favorite book
Are Feeling Lonely And Depressed Linked
Loneliness and depression are closely linked, but they are not exactly the same. Depression is a diagnosable mental health condition characterised by persistent feeling of sadness. Loneliness is a subjective feeling of isolation where our levels of social contact are not as frequent as we want them to be. When a person is lonely and doesnt take steps to address it, it can increase the likelihood of them experiencing depression and other mental health problems. When it comes to loneliness, a person will typically feel alone when the relationships in their life lack the intensity, intimacy and authenticity that they need to feel content.
If you’ve been feeling lonely and isolated, know that it is something you can work to minimise. With some of the tips outlined in this piece, you can break the cycle of loneliness and depression and prevent these feelings from worsening overtime.
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